Also, researchers like Prof John Gottman have shown that the reason for a breakdown can be defined to two critical factors: Shutting down by men and demanding conversations by Women.
We can simply say men being in their “prince state” and women being in their “masculine state”.
If this is where you find yourselves you are not alone, this paradigm is everywhere in our culture and the largest reason we have a 60% divorce rate.
Gottman and Levenson discovered that couples interaction had enormous stability over time (about 80% stability in conflict discussions separated by 3 years). They also discovered that most relationship problems (69%) never get resolved but are “perpetual” problems based on personality differences between partners. That was discovered by seeing couples in the lab every 3 years, then every 6 years, and so on.
We know from this research and our own experience with thousands of couples that the 60% divorce rate can be reversed. We get you may be struggling and we want you to know that you have the power to turn it around even if your partner is shut down and seems not interested.
Marie and I used to be there too. Always arguing, never on the same page, constantly struggling over small issues, fighting over kids, money and sex. Then we found the Communication CODE and our relationship blossomed. We now know the power behind this statement: